WHO Poll
Q: 2023/24 Hopes & aspirations for this season
a. As Champions of Europe there's no reason we shouldn't be pushing for a top 7 spot & a run in the Cups
24%
  
b. Last season was a trophy winning one and there's only one way to go after that, I expect a dull mid table bore fest of a season
17%
  
c. Buy some f***ing players or we're in a battle to stay up & that's as good as it gets
18%
  
d. Moyes out
37%
  
e. New season you say, woohoo time to get the new kit and wear it it to the pub for all the big games, the wags down there call me Mr West Ham
3%
  



Far Cough 10:37 Sun Dec 8
Derek and Clive
CUNT

Replies - Newest Posts First (Show In Chronological Order)

BRANDED 4:17 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
He 'it me

ted fenton 4:11 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
I still have the original vinyl was funny back in the day.

Razzle 4:11 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
I knew a lady from Amsterdam, she filled up cunt up full of clam, she was a very stupid fucking Dutch bitch

PistonHammered 3:42 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
NURSE!!!!!

Sir Alf 3:34 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
"I'm not going change your sheets anymore Mr Hastings"
and the telephone call with Colin. A couple of my favs.

Also the songs from Cook:
"Dutch Bi*tch" and "Oh Flo I love you so"

Comedy gold.!

Far Cough 3:31 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
Hello Colin is funny as fuck

Come On You Irons 3:29 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
For me, the "I saw this bloke the other day" conversation/skit remains the funniest thing I have ever heard. I never fail to laugh out loud whenever I listen to it. Comedy gold.

Dan M 12:56 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
Just to clarify - that was the ONLY time a teacher ever asked me not to tell my parents about something.

Dan M 12:56 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
Loved these albums when I was a teenager. Got one from a mate and after our geography teacher caught us quoting lines from it he lent us the other two (after promising we wouldn't tell our parents or any other teachers).

As much as they occasionally get quoted now amongst mates (and I have a habit of saying "you join us in Zurich for the World Coughing Championship" rather than helping if my kids have a coughing fit) I couldn't imagine actually sitting down and listening to them in their entirety.

Sydney_Iron 11:59 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
Basically, she suffered from what was known in the medical trade as 'lobsters-up-the-arsehole'.

Lobsterisimus Bummakisimus

Moncurs Putting Iron 11:47 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
Even helped make Acid House history.

violator 11:41 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
I saw this bloke the other day..

Noah 11:35 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
You’ve tested me in the past!

So I put my dirty great hobnail boots on and kicked her cunt in!

I said Dolly, will you take a photograph of that?

Too Much Too Young 11:32 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
I said "Dolly".....

punter 8:08 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
whales lying around sucking plank-ton
they dont like being wanked on

Leonard Hatred 7:25 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
Hello Colin

chim chim cha boo 5:21 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
Did you see that dead Pope the other day?

Didn't half give me the fucking horn.

Sydney_Iron 4:54 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
Jump! You fucker, jump!
Jump into this here blanket what we are holding
And you will be all right
He jumped, hit the deck, broke his fucking neck -
There was no blanket

y2smif 1:35 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
All the brasso has come out and gone all over your botty

Any Old Iron 1:16 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
Derek and Clive Live was great, and a lot of it still makes me laugh all these years later, but the second and third albums were shite.

zebthecat 12:31 Mon Dec 9
Re: Derek and Clive
And as they race to the line it's Vagina being pressed by The Prick, with The Poof making rapid progress, trying to squeeze in between Buttocks and the rail.

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